Being a adult scares the shit out of me.
You spend your life from the ages of 11-15 wanting to be older than you actually are; worrying about your appearance, going to parties, drinking, having relationships, thinking about or actually having sex.
But then when you hit the age of 16, everything starts to sink in.
This might be an over-exaggeration for some people due to my anxiety and my stressfulness, but i began to worry about everything. EVERYTHING. It could be as big as a career choice, or as small as what alcohol to take to a party so i didn't look as incompetent and naive as i actually was.
As i started to get older, i noticed what i worried about changed. It was no longer boys or makeup, it was career paths, jobs, finance and being able to deal with the added pressures of being an adult. Society thinks that teenagers are prepared for this giant leap into another life style, but the truth is we're all so shocked about how hard it is we feel scared to ask any questions. The useless and compulsory 'life skill' classes didn't teach me that i would have to pay 20 to 30 pounds each month on my phone bill, they didn't inform me that in my first year of GCSEs i had to already decide what career i wanted to pursue for the rest of my life, and they certainly didn't tell me what an economical slump the world is in and will still be in by the time i have to handle a life on my own.
The independence, that scares me the most. I'm not too lazy regarding chores and what not, but my mum still hasn't taught me how to work the washing machine and i have an actual fear of the vacuum cleaner. Do you see my concerns? I'm not saying that i would die if i was left on my own, but i would definitely struggle and it bothers me that no one warned me of this until about 2 years ago.
I'm aware i'm blessed compared to others, and no i'm not talking about people in third world countries, i mean the people who had to grow up a lot quicker than the rest of us to deal with family issues. I guess that still applies to those people in third world countries. Whatever the case, i take my hat off to you wonderful people.
I'm just scared for the future, and i know that's natural but i like to be in control. In this situation, i am not in control and i don't like it.
I know i'm not the only one who feels this way, maybe i should start up an internet support group like Dan Howell and sprinkle my advice onto budding worriers of the adulty adult world.
Maybe the future won't give me too much trouble, but being a cynic, i don't have very high hopes.